# AstroJokes


## Pages

- [Shop](https://astrojokes.com/shop/)
- [Terms and Conditions](https://astrojokes.com/terms-and-conditions/): We are Estiuka Limited, doing business as Astro Jokes ('Company', 'we', 'us', or 'our'), a company registered in England at London (WC2) Office, 7 Bell Yard, London WC2A 2JR.
- [Cookie Policy](https://astrojokes.com/cookie-policy/): This Cookie Policy explains how Estiuka Limited ("Company," "we," "us," and "our") uses cookies and similar technologies to recognize you when you visit our website at https://astrojokes.com ("Website").
- [Shipping Policy](https://astrojokes.com/shipping-policy/): At Astro Jokes, we strive to ensure that your orders are delivered promptly and in excellent condition.
- [FAQ](https://astrojokes.com/faq/): There are no additional customs or tax fees for international orders.
- [Contact us](https://astrojokes.com/contact-us/)
- [About us](https://astrojokes.com/about-us/): At Astro Jokes we believe the universe isn’t always here to be taken seriously.
- [Home](https://astrojokes.com/): Star-approved tees, mugs, totes, and more... engineered to make some folks beam, others seethe, and the cosmos wonder what it created.
- [Returns Policy](https://astrojokes.com/returns-policy/): Thank you for your purchase. We hope you are happy with your purchase.
- [Privacy Policy](https://astrojokes.com/privacy-policy/): Questions or concerns? Reading this privacy notice will help you understand your privacy rights and choices.
- [Blog](https://astrojokes.com/blog/)
- [My account](https://astrojokes.com/my-account/)
- [Checkout](https://astrojokes.com/checkout/)
- [Cart](https://astrojokes.com/cart/)

## Products

- [Pisces Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/pisces-athletic-club-tee/): Builds team spirit through imagination, intuition and a playlist dramatic enough for a championship documentary.
- [Aquarius Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/aquarius-athletic-club-tee/): Introduces a new formation nobody understands, then wins with it. The club may look unconventional, but Aquarius calls that being three seasons ahead.
- [Capricorn Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/capricorn-athletic-club-tee/): Runs the club like a long-term project with quarterly goals and zero wasted effort. Promotion is not a dream. It is already in the spreadsheet.
- [Sagittarius Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/sagittarius-athletic-club-tee/): Turns away fixtures into mini adventures and training drills into challenges nobody remembers agreeing to.
- [Scorpio Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/scorpio-athletic-club-tee/): Quiet in the team meeting, terrifyingly prepared on game day. Knows the opposition’s habits, weaknesses and probably what they had for breakfast.
- [Libra Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/libra-athletic-club-tee/): Keeps the team balanced, the kit immaculate and the group photo suspiciously perfect.
- [Virgo Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/virgo-athletic-club-tee/): Training schedules colour-coded, equipment counted twice, and recovery plans already printed.
- [Leo Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/leo-athletic-club-tee/): Runs every match like it deserves a spotlight, an entrance song and a standing ovation.
- [Cancer Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/cancer-athletic-club-tee/): The club captain who remembers everyone’s birthday, checks who got home safely and still defends the team like a fortress. Soft voice, steel shell.
- [Gemini Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/gemini-athletic-club-tee/): Two coaches, three game plans and a team chat that never sleeps. Brilliant at changing tactics halfway through, then explaining why both versions were right.
- [Taurus Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/taurus-athletic-club-tee/): Built on consistency, comfort and a suspiciously well-stocked snack table.
- [Aries Athletic Club Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/aries-athletic-club-tee/): Runs the club like every warm-up is a final and every friendly match is a personal challenge.
- [Zodiac Society Mug: Pisces Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-pisces-edition/): Dream-fueled empathy engine. Intuition on speaker, reality on snooze.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Aquarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-aquarius-edition/): Certified anomaly. Ideas download from space, rules upload to trash.
- [Zodiac Society Mug: Capricorn Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-capricorn-edition/): Ambition with receipts. Climbs higher, stacks smarter, calendar color-coded.
- [Zodiac Society Mug: Sagittarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-sagittarius-edition/): Free spirit with a truth rocket. Book first, explain later.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Scorpio Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-scorpio-edition/): Mystery on lock. Loyalty runs deep. Aura set to Do Not Disturb.
- [Zodiac Society Mug: Libra Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-libra-edition/): Taste is ruthless. It isn’t indecision when you’re curating balance and beauty.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Virgo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-virgo-edition-2/): Not a perfectionist. A systems architect with a label maker. Chaos bows before you.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Leo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-leo-edition/): Main character by default. Ego with a heart of gold and a spotlight warranty.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Cancer Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-cancer-edition/): Sensitive, not weak. Armored shell, lunar Wi-Fi. Love hard, retreat faster. Trailblazer. Adrenaline junkie. Firestarter.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Gemini Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-gemini-edition/): Double the wit. Triple the notifications. Conversational parkour since birth.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Taurus Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-taurus-edition/): Stubborn? Try unmoved by nonsense. Snack stash secured, vibes set to chill.
- [Zodiac Society Mug – Aries Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-mug-aries-edition/): Trailblazer. Adrenaline junkie. Firestarter. If there’s a red button, you pressed it before the meeting started.
- [Pisces Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/pisces-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Day-dreaming mer-human crying over dog commercials. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Aquarius Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/aquarius-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Quirky alien sending memes instead of emotions. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Capricorn Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/capricorn-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Career-climbing mountain goat; schedules fun for Q4. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Sagittarius Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/sagittarius-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Human passport stamp powered by blunt honesty and Wi-Fi. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Scorpio Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/scorpio-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Secretive mystery box; trusts no one, forgets nothing. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Libra Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/libra-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Self-appointed royalty; requires applause to stay hydrated. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Virgo Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/virgo-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Walking spell-checker plotting world order via spreadsheets. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Leo Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/leo-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Self-appointed royalty; requires applause to stay hydrated. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Cancer Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/cancer-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Squishy cinnamon roll that pinch-attacks when feelings poke. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Gemini Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/gemini-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Two chatty roommates sharing one mouth; volume stuck on 'max'. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Taurus Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/taurus-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Luxury-loving couch tank that only moves for snacks. Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Aries Definition - Tote bag](https://astrojokes.com/product/aries-definition-tote-bag/): Definition: Rocket-powered toddler who hears 'danger' as 'double-dog dare' Your cosmic catch-all for groceries, gym kits, laptops and rogue star charts.
- [Mercury Retrograde - Not My Fault Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/mercury-retrograde-not-my-fault-tee/): Emails missed. Messages scrambled. If I left you on read, blame the planet, not me.
- [Mercury Retrograde - I Didn't Ghost You Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/mercury-retrograde-i-didnt-ghost-you-tee/): No calls. No texts. No replies. I wasn’t ghosting you. Mercury just took over the group chat and deleted the vibe.
- [Pisces Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/pisces-definition-tee/): Definition: Day-dreaming mer-human crying over dog commercials. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Aquarius Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/aquarius-definition-tee/): Definition: Quirky alien sending memes instead of emotions. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Capricorn Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/capricorn-definition-tee/): Definition: Career-climbing mountain goat; schedules fun for Q4. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Sagittarius Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/sagittarius-definition-tee/): Definition: Human passport stamp powered by blunt honesty and Wi-Fi. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Scorpio Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/scorpio-definition-tee/): Definition: Secretive mystery box; trusts no one, forgets nothing. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Libra Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/libra-definition-tee/): Definition: Charming scale that can’t pick a pizza topping to save its life.
- [Virgo Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/virgo-definition-tee/): Definition: Walking spell-checker plotting world order via spreadsheets.
- [Leo Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/leo-definition-tee/): Definition: Self-appointed royalty; requires applause to stay hydrated. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Cancer Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/cancer-definition-tee/): Definition: Squishy cinnamon roll that pinch-attacks when feelings poke.
- [Taurus Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/taurus-definition-tee/): Definition: Luxury-loving couch tank that only moves for snacks. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Gemini Definition tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/gemini-definition-tee/): Definition: Two chatty roommates sharing one mouth; volume stuck on 'max' After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Aries Definition Tee](https://astrojokes.com/product/aries-definition-tee/): Definition: Rocket-powered toddler who hears 'danger' as 'double-dog dare' After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Pisces Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-pisces-edition/): Dream-fueled empathy engine. Intuition on speaker, reality on snooze. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Aquarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-aquarius-edition/): Certified anomaly. Ideas download from space, rules upload to trash. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Capricorn Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-capricorn-edition/): Ambition with receipts. Climbs higher, stacks smarter, calendar color-coded.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Sagittarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-sagittarius-edition/): Free spirit with a truth rocket. Book first, explain later. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Scorpio Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-scorpio-edition/): Mystery on lock. Loyalty runs deep. Aura set to Do Not Disturb. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Libra Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-libra-edition/): Taste is ruthless. It isn’t indecision when you’re curating balance and beauty.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Virgo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-virgo-edition/): Not a perfectionist. A systems architect with a label maker. Chaos bows before you.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Leo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-leo-edition/): Main character by default. Ego with a heart of gold and a spotlight warranty.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Cancer Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-cancer-edition/): Sensitive, not weak. Armored shell, lunar Wi-Fi. Love hard, retreat faster.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Gemini Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-gemini-edition/): Double the wit. Triple the notifications. Conversational parkour since birth.
- [Zodiac Society Tee: Taurus Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-taurus-edition/): Stubborn? Try unmoved by nonsense. Snack stash secured, vibes set to chill.
- [Zodiac Society Tee – Aries Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/zodiac-society-tee-aries-edition/): Trailblazer. Adrenaline junkie. Firestarter. If there’s a red button, you pressed it before the meeting started.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Pisces Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-pisces-edition/): Dreamy and defiant. It’s not escapism if reality offends your sensibilities. You curate better worlds.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Aquarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-aquarius-edition/): Offbeat by design. It’s not eccentricity if conformity puts you to sleep.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Capricorn Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-capricorn-edition/): Work ethic but make it luxury. It’s not diligence when financial mediocrity is stalking your bank account, it’s survival.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Sagittarius Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-sagittarius-edition/): Airport energy, truth first. It’s not bluntness if sugar-coating insults the intellect.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Scorpio Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-scorpio-edition/): Sunglasses on, radar up. It’s not paranoia if you’ve seen the receipts. After several lifetimes and thousands of years, here’s a tee the stars finally agree on.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Libra Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-libra-edition/): Taste level: ruthless curation. It’s not indecision if every other option is beneath you.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Virgo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-virgo-edition/): Clean lines for chaos editors. It’s not nitpicking if your mess fails the refinement test.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Leo Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-leo-edition/): Main-character print. It’s not ostentation if the world keeps begging for an encore.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Cancer Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-cancer-edition/): Soft face, sharp read. It’s not moodiness when you’re tuned to deeper waters and everyone else is on mute.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Gemini Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-gemini-edition/): Two channels, one frequency. It’s not duplicity if both personas eclipse their dullness.
- [Don’t Get Me Wrong Tee – Taurus Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-taurus-edition/): For the immovable gourmet of opinions. Says what you already know: it’s not stubbornness if your reasoning is airtight.
- [Don't Get Me Wrong Tee - Aries Edition](https://astrojokes.com/product/dont-get-me-wrong-tee-aries-edition/): Smirk on, brakes off. Translates your default setting: it’s not recklessness if the masses can’t keep pace.

## Optional

- [Agent (MCP protocol)](websites-agents.hostinger.com/astrojokes.com/mcp)

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